How to Overcome Limiting Beliefs Holding You Back
By Rachel Krider
Have you ever wondered why you can know exactly what you need to do to create a better result in your life, yet somehow keep getting in your own way?
You have the goal.
You have the ambition.
You might even have a perfectly good plan.
But when it comes time to take action, something happens.
You hesitate. You procrastinate. You convince yourself the timing isn't right.
And here's the crazy part.
You can be incredibly intelligent and still have absolutely no idea why you're doing it.
Shane and I were exploring this very topic during our latest Facebook Live, and he shared some fascinating insights into how our beliefs influence our decisions, our behaviour and ultimately the results we create.
The conversation was about something most of us don't spend nearly enough time examining.
The beliefs we're operating from without even realising they're there.
If you've ever wondered how to overcome limiting beliefs, this is a great place to start.
Table of Contents
What Are Limiting Beliefs?
We all have beliefs about ourselves, other people, money, success and how life works.
Some are empowering.
Others can quietly hold us back.
And the tricky thing is that we don't always recognise them as beliefs.
Shane explained that many of these beliefs develop through experiences we've had, things we've witnessed or conclusions we drew when we were much younger.
Over time, they become part of our internal operating system.
Think about that.
You could have formed a belief when you were eight years old that's still influencing the decisions you're making at 48.
And you might not even know it.
The Beliefs You Don't Know You Have
Shane gave an example that really illustrates this.
Imagine you're a child at school and you have an embarrassing experience in front of your classmates.
Maybe you get laughed at.
Maybe the other kids bring it up repeatedly.
You might walk away from that experience with a conclusion:
It's safer not to draw attention to myself.
Now fast-forward 30 years.
You're an intelligent, capable adult with big ambitions.
You want to put yourself forward.
You want to speak up.
You want to take on a leadership role or perhaps start a business.
But every time an opportunity presents itself, you find a reason not to act.
The timing isn't right.
You need more preparation.
Maybe it's not such a great opportunity after all.
And here's what Shane pointed out.
Your conscious mind might be telling you that you want success, while an old belief is quietly telling you that being visible isn't safe.
So you pull back.
Then your reasoning mind gets busy justifying why you did.
That's how limiting beliefs can influence behaviour without us even recognising what's happening.
How to Identify Limiting Beliefs: My Own Wake-Up Call
I shared something during the Live that was a real turning point in my life.
When I was around 31, I came to a rather confronting realisation.
I was financially worse off than when I'd left home at 16.
I'd been working incredibly hard in a previous business.
I'm talking 16-hour days.
Six, sometimes seven days a week.
And despite all that effort, I wasn't creating the financial results I wanted.
I was exhausted, frustrated and wondering what the heck I was doing wrong.
So I started examining my beliefs around money and success.
I did a lot of journaling back then, and one particular belief kept showing up.
To make a lot of money, you have to work really, really hard.
Now, where did that come from?
When I started looking at it, I realised I'd picked it up from my father and grandfather.
Both were hardworking men.
Both believed in having a strong work ethic.
And somewhere along the way, I'd taken that lesson and given it a meaning that wasn't necessarily intended.
I'd confused having a strong work ethic with having to struggle.
Those are two very different things.
I didn't need to abandon the value of hard work.
I needed to question the belief that success had to be difficult, exhausting and something I constantly had to fight for.
That was a massive shift for me.
I started asking myself:
What if I could be successful and actually enjoy the process?
What if I could work smarter?
What if I could create results without making everything so darn difficult?
And that change in thinking opened me up to a completely different approach to business.
Why We Self-Sabotage Even When We Want to Succeed
One of the most interesting points Shane made was that our minds can become incredibly good at defending our existing patterns.
Even when those patterns aren't serving us.
You decide you're going to do something different.
Maybe it's launching a business.
Maybe it's improving your health.
Maybe it's having a difficult conversation or putting yourself forward for something bigger.
You're excited.
You're committed.
Then you get uncomfortable.
And suddenly your mind produces a whole list of very convincing reasons why you should stop.
Here's something worth considering.
Are those reasons genuine, or are you protecting an old belief?
Now, I'm not suggesting every hesitation is self-sabotage.
Sometimes there are legitimate reasons to change direction.
But when the same thing keeps happening, it's worth paying attention.
You set a goal.
You move towards it.
You become uncomfortable.
You find a reason to retreat.
And then you repeat the whole cycle.
That's a pattern.
And patterns can be changed.
How to Change Limiting Beliefs and Break Old Patterns
Shane talked about the importance of becoming an observer of your own mind.
I love this concept.
Because there's a difference between having a thought and automatically accepting that thought as the truth.
Just because your mind produces a conclusion doesn't mean you have to follow it.
You can question it.
You can examine it.
You can decide whether it's taking you in the direction you actually want to go.
And you don't have to sit around analysing every thought that pops into your head.
Start by noticing the moments when your behaviour doesn't line up with your goals.
Ask yourself:
What am I telling myself right now?
Where did I learn to think this way?
Is this belief actually true?
Is it serving me?
Is it moving me towards the life I want?
What would I do differently if I wasn't operating from this belief?
Sometimes the answers can be quite confronting.
But that's where the opportunity is.
You can't deliberately change a pattern you haven't recognised.
Shane's Business Breakthrough
Shane shared a great example from his early days in business.
He'd been taught a simple process.
Find suitable people.
Ask the right questions.
Help them understand what was available.
And let them make their own decisions.
Sounds straightforward, right?
Except Shane had an underlying belief he hadn't recognised.
He believed people needed to be convinced.
So even though he understood the process intellectually, he kept trying to persuade people.
And his results were terrible.
At one point, he was getting ready to call his coach, Randy, to complain about what wasn't working.
But before making the call, he stopped and imagined what Randy would probably say.
He'd likely tell him he was trying to sell rather than following the process.
Shane's first reaction?
No, I'm not!
And then he had to admit something.
Actually, he kind of was.
So he decided to try something different.
He stopped trying to convince people.
He simply followed the process and allowed them to make their own decisions.
And the results changed.
After previously taking around 100 people through the process without anyone moving forward, two of the next five purchased.
That wasn't proof that every future conversation would work out the same way.
But it was a powerful demonstration of something.
The behaviour he'd been resisting was the very behaviour he needed to adopt.
And the belief that had been holding him back wasn't something he even realised he had.
The Choice That Can Change Your Direction
Another idea Shane shared was what he calls the Y in the road.
I think this is such a useful way to look at things.
Imagine you've set a goal.
You know what you want.
You know the actions you need to take.
But you find yourself hesitating, making excuses or slipping back into familiar behaviour.
Eventually, you reach a point where you have to make a decision.
Are you going to continue pursuing the goal?
Or are you choosing not to?
And sometimes it's worth being very direct with yourself.
Fine.
Don't do it.
Stay where you are.
Keep doing what you've always done.
Is that really what you want?
For many people, the answer is a very definite NO.
Well, okay then.
What are you going to do about it?
The point isn't to ignore legitimate concerns or pretend there are no risks.
It's to recognise when discomfort has quietly started making your decisions for you.
Because discomfort doesn't necessarily mean you're heading in the wrong direction.
Sometimes it simply means you're doing something unfamiliar.
Limiting Beliefs About Money and Success
Something else we explored during the Live was how easily we can adopt other people's expectations.
Especially when it comes to money and the economy.
You hear people saying business is difficult.
The economy is struggling.
Nobody is spending.
It's a terrible time to start something new.
And before you know it, you've accepted those opinions as your own personal forecast.
Shane shared an example from the dot-com downturn.
Someone who had started in business around the same time as him decided the economy meant people would stop purchasing their products.
So he left the business and went back to employment.
Shane made a different decision.
He wasn't prepared to assume that the broader economic situation had already determined his personal outcome.
That doesn't mean economic conditions don't matter.
Of course they do.
But there's a difference between understanding what's happening around you and deciding that it automatically limits what's possible for you.
I remember taking a very deliberate approach during the global financial crisis.
For several years, I dramatically reduced the media I consumed and focused on reading books, studying personal development and feeding my mind with material that supported the direction I wanted to go.
That was a period of enormous financial growth for me.
I'm not suggesting that switching off the news magically creates success.
But I do believe what you continually give your attention to influences how you think, the decisions you make and the actions you take.
And those things matter.
Creating an Upward Spiral in Your Life
One of the concepts Shane explored was the idea of creating an upward spiral.
Think about how different areas of your life influence one another.
When you're looking after your health, sleeping well and feeling good physically, you're often in a better position to think clearly.
When you're thinking clearly, you tend to make better decisions.
When you make better decisions, you create better opportunities.
And those improvements can start reinforcing one another.
But the opposite can happen too.
You're not sleeping properly.
You stop exercising.
You're feeding your mind with negativity.
You feel frustrated.
Your decisions become reactive.
And before you know it, you're heading in a direction you never intended.
I've experienced both.
And one thing I've learned is that when my thinking starts slipping, it's worth looking at the basics.
Am I getting enough sleep?
Am I moving my body?
Am I eating properly?
What am I listening to?
What am I reading?
What am I continually focusing on?
Sometimes we make personal growth far more complicated than it needs to be.
Get the basics working for you again.
Then pay attention to the choices you're making.
An upward spiral doesn't mean nothing ever goes wrong.
It means developing the awareness and habits that help you respond more constructively when challenges show up.
How to Stop Self-Sabotaging and Start Moving Forward
If there's one thing I'd love you to take away from this conversation, it's this:
Just because you've believed something for years doesn't mean you have to keep believing it.
And just because you've responded to situations in a particular way for decades doesn't mean that's how you have to respond tomorrow.
You can question your conclusions.
You can challenge your assumptions.
You can develop new habits.
You can make different decisions.
And sometimes a relatively small change in thinking can lead to a very different result.
I look back at that younger version of myself, working ridiculous hours and believing financial success had to involve enormous struggle.
I was certainly committed.
I was certainly willing to work.
But I was operating from a belief that wasn't helping me.
Once I started questioning it, I became open to different ways of doing things.
And that changed a great deal for me.
So here's my question for you.
What belief are you currently treating as a fact that might actually be holding you back?
And perhaps more importantly...
What could change in your life if you stopped allowing that belief to make your decisions?
That's worth spending some time thinking about.
If you'd like to explore the full conversation, Shane goes into much greater detail in the Facebook Live above.
And if this has you thinking about your own future and the possibilities you might not have considered, perhaps it's time for a conversation.
Rachel Krider
VP World Wide Marketing
Prosperity Of Life
Frequently Asked Questions
What are limiting beliefs?
Limiting beliefs are assumptions or conclusions that can restrict how you think, behave or approach opportunities. They may develop through past experiences, family influences or repeated patterns of thinking.
How do I identify my limiting beliefs?
Start by noticing recurring situations where your behaviour doesn't match your goals. Pay attention to the explanations you give yourself, particularly when you repeatedly avoid taking action.
Can limiting beliefs about money affect financial success?
They can influence how you approach earning, investing, risk and business opportunities. For example, believing that earning more money must always involve greater struggle may affect the opportunities you're willing to consider.
How do I overcome limiting beliefs?
Begin by identifying the belief, questioning where it came from and examining whether it's actually true. Then practise making different choices and taking actions that support the outcome you want.
What's the difference between a limiting belief and self-sabotage?
A limiting belief is an underlying assumption. Self-sabotage describes behaviour that interferes with your goals. Sometimes an unexamined belief can contribute to repeated self-sabotaging behaviour.
When I left traditional business in 2012 and decided to do something completely different in my 50s, I had to be open to the possibility that there was a better way.
Fourteen years later, I'm very glad I challenged some of those old beliefs about having to work long and hard. 😁
In my current business, I speak with people almost every day who are desperate for change, yet many never take action. I suspect their limiting beliefs play a significant role.
Great article, Rachel. 😀
What a fantastic read! So many valuable takeaways. 🤗 My favourite is the reminder that what we continually give our attention to influences how we think, the decisions we make, and the actions we take.
It brings me back to the saying, “What we think about, we bring about,” and the power of the Law of Attraction. Such a great reminder to be intentional about where we focus our energy and attention.💖
It's amazing how easily we can mistake an old belief for the truth, without even questioning where it came from. I love the reminder that growth starts with awareness, and that we always have the ability to question what we believe and choose differently. Such a valuable read!
The self sabotage cycle was real for me once upon a time. Go for your dreams, but just not too far because it falls outside of my and everyone else close to me, comfort zone. So glad I gave myself the space and grace to see what would happen if I did. And guess what, life got better, for us all 🖤xx. Thanks for the read to reconsider what we think we believe to be true.
What a great post. It like giving yourself the gift to go beyond of where you are now. Powerful questions and most definitely the best way to understand how to move to the next milestone in life.